I am a huge Neil Diamond fan. Or, should I say I hugely enjoy the singing of Neil Diamond? I'm trying to find a way to say I love the music of Neil Diamond without looking like a plus-sized woman. heh. heh.
Since his songs are now played as elevator music, I regularly embarrass the stuffing out of WD in Wal-Mart, the grocery store, the optometrist and anywhere else "Sweet Caroline" is played. You see, I am of the opinion that we MUST all chime in (loudly) on the Bah, Bah, Bum's after he warbles, "sweeeet Car-o-liiine". And so I do. I chime right in. Loudly. Everywhere.
So I will be strolling toward you in Safeway, pushing my overloaded cart with the wonky wheel and, as we draw abreast near the pasta sauce I will suddenly belt out, "Bah Bah Bum" to accompany the overhead music.
There are two, no three, consequences of this obsession of mine:
1) WD cannot stand the song stylings of Mr. Diamond
2) Anytime "Sweet Caroline" comes over any speaker she immediately scurries away, putting at least 50 feet between us.
3) I am no longer allowed in the 37th street Wal-mart. One of their assistant managers has jumpy nerves and no appreciation for the classics.
The past few days I have had lots of songs running through my head in a loop. Some oldies, some goldies, some truly fabulous stuff but this morning, I woke up after another mostly sleepless night to "Life is a Cabaret".
I have been wallowing in a little depression due to the unexpected news from the doctor but that's done now.
"What good is sitting alone in your room? Life is a holiday!"
So, I will take a deep breath, realize I didn't get a death sentence, just a little set back. I will take my prescriptions, I will cut down on the cleaning (danggit), the caffeine, the little exercise I get and I will relax and wait for concrete news following the latest tests.
I will also stop lying in bed at night, mentally rewriting my will and doling out my pathetically few sentimental possessions in my head.
I'm going to focus on the cabaret.
Bah Bah Bum, good times never seemed so good.
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So, you've put down the knitting and the book as well as the broom?
ReplyDeleteOkay. You and Firefox are Neil freakin' Diamond fans! As soon as I wrote my derogatory comment about Neil Diamond (comparing him to fingernails on chalkboard), Firefox crashed. Sigh.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry.
You go ahead and join Firefox in your deep admiration for Neil. I promise I won't snicker. Or cringe.
Life IS a cabernet....err... I mean cabaret, old (new) friend, so try to relax and enjoy it. (Even if it means singing along to Neil Diamond in the grocery store. And if you're gonna do it, do it at the top of your lungs! It makes people look at you out of the corner of their eyes, and move away - gets you through the check-out faster, too! Hahahahahahahaha)
(Even funnier? My word verification - flymagu. Remember Mr. Magoo? Could he fly?)
Hi ladies!
ReplyDeleteYes Leah, I`m back from Dramaland.
Baggie, are you intimating there are actually people (besides WD) out there who are not Neil Diamond fans?? Perish the thought!
And,I am all for the faster grocery check-out.
flymagu - well, he certainly couldn't drive.
In my grocery they don't play anything I can (or want to) recognize, and I am more likely to scare people by saying rude things to the ceiling speakers than by singing along.
ReplyDeleteYesterday Blogger informed me I wasn't following anyone. I'm glad they found everybody for me today!
Mary Anne in Kentucky
You sing all you want *smile*. I'm not a friend or foe of neil diamond and I have a feeling if I heard you singing his songs I would find myself singing them later in the day. My kids are the same way so I could see us all now singing "Sweet Caroline" riding down the road in the van lol. Hope everything turns out well with the tests and doctor *hugs*.
ReplyDelete